5 Common IEP Mistakes Parents Make (and How to Avoid Them)
Sep 19, 2025
Navigating the special education system is a journey filled with both hope and hurdles. For many parents, the process can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re trying to ensure your child receives the support they need. Mistakes are common, but with a bit of awareness and preparation, you can avoid the most frequent pitfalls and become a more empowered member of your child’s IEP team. Let’s explore five mistakes that often trip up families—and how you can sidestep them with confidence.
Mistake 1: Not Putting Requests in Writing
It’s easy to rely on quick conversations—maybe a phone call with the principal or a chat with your child’s teacher at pickup. But these verbal exchanges, while convenient, don’t create a legal record. Without something in writing, there’s no official timeline for the school to respond, and misunderstandings can easily arise. Imagine asking for a new evaluation for your child with ADHD, only to find weeks later that no one remembers the conversation.
To avoid this, always follow up important discussions with an email that summarizes what was said. For formal requests, such as asking for an IEP meeting or a new assessment, use a dated letter or email. This not only creates a clear paper trail but also triggers the school’s legal obligation to respond within a set timeframe. It’s a simple habit that can make a world of difference if disputes arise later.
Mistake 2: Accepting Vague or Unmeasurable Goals
An IEP should be a roadmap, not a wish list. Goals like “Johnny will improve his reading skills” sound positive but are impossible to measure. Without clear benchmarks, it’s hard to know if your child is making progress or if the school is delivering on its promises. This is especially important for children with learning disabilities or dyslexia, where progress can be subtle and easily overlooked.
Instead, insist on SMART goals—Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. For example, “By the end of the school year, when given a third-grade level text, Johnny will read 90 words per minute with 95% accuracy.” Don’t hesitate to ask, “How will we know when this goal is met?” This keeps everyone accountable and ensures your child’s growth is tracked in a meaningful way.
Mistake 3: Signing the IEP at the Meeting
IEP meetings can be long, emotional, and sometimes overwhelming. It’s natural to feel pressure to sign the document right then and there, especially if the team is waiting. But signing on the spot can lead to regrets, especially if you have lingering questions or concerns.
You have every right to take the IEP home for review. Politely let the team know, “I’d like to review this with my spouse/partner/advocate before I sign. I’ll get it back to you within a few days.” This pause gives you time to read the document carefully, reflect on what was discussed, and ensure it truly matches your child’s needs. It’s a small step that can prevent big headaches down the road.
Mistake 4: Focusing Only on Weaknesses
It’s easy to zero in on what your child struggles with—after all, the IEP is designed to address challenges. But a plan that only lists deficits can be discouraging for both you and your child. It also misses out on powerful opportunities to use your child’s strengths as a springboard for growth.
Make sure the “Strengths” section of the IEP is detailed and meaningful. Talk with the team about how your child’s interests and talents can be woven into their learning. For instance, if your child with autism is fascinated by trains, that passion can be used to make reading, math, or even social skills lessons more engaging. When strengths are front and center, your child is more likely to feel confident and motivated.
Mistake 5: Waiting for the Annual Review to Raise Concerns
Many parents believe they have to wait for the yearly IEP meeting to bring up problems. But if you wait months to address a service that isn’t being provided or an accommodation that isn’t working, your child could lose valuable time and fall further behind. This is especially risky for children whose symptoms or needs can change quickly, such as those with anxiety or sensory processing issues.
You don’t have to wait. If something isn’t right, you can request an IEP meeting at any time—just put your request in writing. Being proactive means your child gets the help they need when they need it, not months later.
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